Thursday, February 16, 2006

Schnitzel in Motion!

Just got off the phone with Julie the NephewMama, and, on the day Schnitzel is officially anointed, he did her first 1080. These accountant babies are first-rate with their timing.

at least that's what Dick Button would say if he were providing color commentary on the fetus movements at:

...and a bleg

Who is "Mamie Van..." something? Van Doran? Or is it Mimi? In any case... anybody know who she is? An actress? Fried chicken magnate? The Norwegian Olympic womens' luge coach? I need to know.

Way to Name! That! Fetus!

Jim The Baby Nephew lovingly invites his future brother or sister to suck it.

Boy, can you guys name a fetus. I hope my sister has a minimum of 4000 more babies just for the fun of prenatally naming them.

Since Taufling was permanently retired when Jim the Baby Nephew was baptized--that is correct, there is a wee jersey the size of half a banana with TAUFLING on the back hanging up in his nursery--I was searching for something awww-able and genderless and pale-sounding. Babylike was good. German was better. "Bode" was non-negotable.


Sonic Boom, from Dan the Reader: Awesome. Especially if the fetus is a wicked kicker like I was. Sonic Boom would not get beat up in his Gymboree classes.

Casper, from Anonymous: As in, the member of the Magi and also the The Ghost. Strong competetor amongst the readers in Champagneville. This is because my readers want the baby to get beat up in his Gymboree classes.

Amblyopsis Rosae from WanderingUpNorth The Reader: Because of this. It's a blind fish! In a hatchery! A hatchery in the Ozarks! I've been spending the past ten days trying to find "Amblyopsis" on a bike license plate!

"Kidogo," from Esther The Possibly Pending Sister In Law: Swahili for "little one." I like this because it's likely the only intercontinental flavor the baby will ever come across. It's a Cincinnati fetus. It became a fetus in Cincinnati, it will create its own fetuses in Cincinnati, it will cease to be in Cincinnati. The closest to Swahili-speaking people most Cincinnati fetuses come is surfing past Coming To America on TBS.

WanderingUpNorth The Reader also suggested "Cletus the Fetus," which scared the crap right out of me, as Jim was often refered to as this. Julie the NephewMama and Country the Brother In Law were despondent over the list of family names to choose from, and while I love my family and the cheese-laden foods they prepare, we are heavy on the Florences and the Gertrudes and, yes, the Cletuses. Grandpa was a Clete. And a great guy, but still... Clete.

Mike The Longterm Reader suggested "Banning," which is Gaelic for "blonde child." Banning. If his last name were going to be "Books", or perhaps "the Yankees", that would rule.

Fohlen, from jcat2323: German for "foal" and therefore a strong, strong contender. Julie the NephewMama and I are horsewomen from way back, in the sense that we like to pet them and ride them and look at them but when it comes to deworming them or paying for their breakfast, we're like, "What horse?"

But the winner is Susan The Reader, who suggested Schnitzel. It's German. It's baby cow. It's yummy. Schnitzel! Have it with beer and a Christmas tree. We can't wait to meet you, Schnitzel. May you be every bit as intelligent and successful as your big brother.

Way to go, Susan The Reader. You win absolutely nothing.

"fohlen" was a really close second and I will probably put it in a Ziplock bag for Fetus #3 at

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