Thursday, December 07, 2006

Not on the Registry

I'm a wine snob, which means... not so much to the following:

It looks like a Barbie and Ken wedding gone horribly, horribly wrong.

We are currently pondering groomsmen gifts, which had to be explained to the groom.

"We have to get them a present?"


"But... they're guys."

"I certainly hope so."

I don't know what we'll wind up with, but I can confidently X out the following:

-Car air freshener shaped like a foot
-Stripper gift certificate
-Live wombat
-Autographed picture of Mario Lopez
-Paternity test
-Bride and groom wine bottle covers


Anonymous said...

I like how they had to specifically state that you shouldn't ingest the deer urine.

Cbell said...

It is nice to know that they bottle by hand. Do they collect by hand too? I hope that doe in heat gave them what for if they did!

Anonymous said...

I was all set to volunteer in case y'all needed extras to fill in the pews... But now? I don't know - is it possible for a guy to have friends that would appreciate a good bottle or two of deer urine, and STILL be nice folks?

Toni said...

For our wedding party, we gave them folios from our photographer with placeholders that said something to the effect of "good for two 5x7's." We also gave these to the parents, and those that did readings and stuff. Everyone loves photos.

After the wedding, they just let you know what proofs they choose.

Anonymous said...

We went with monogrammed flasks for our groomsmen. You can pick them up at any Things Remembered and they were quite inexpensive.
I guess the whole thing with the flasks is any of the groomsmen can offer up a shot of courage to the groom as he is waiting for his lovely bride to arrive and walk down the aisle.
Of course - no drinking during the actual ceremony.

Doddy said...

If you ruling out gift certificates... I think you need money clips to hold the roll of bills for the bachelor party.

Josh The Pilot said...

I know y'all are only kidding, but let it be known right now there will be no naked females at my bachelor party, if any females at all, and that's assuming I have a bachelor party. Right now I think I'd rather prefer simply hitting IHOP like what we did for my friend John a couple years ago. Yes, we toasted his last night of singleness with orange juice and we feasted on blueberry pancakes. It was a great time!

Jcat2323 said...

Instructions: "Sprinkle liberally".
Isn't that an oxymoron? (Unless we're talking about cupcake sprinkles, that is.)

red pill junkie said...

So that means no donkeys at the bachelor party josh? OR you could swith to a deer, and go DIY on the whole urine bottling business!! ;-)

amy lou the reader said...


My husband had a cookout for his bachelor party. They watched football, played cribbage, and the younger members of the wedding party played video games. About the only think risqué at the party were the brats, which were cooked in beer and 2 sticks of butter.

Out of curiosity, MB, what kind of wine do you like? I don't know much about wine, except that I like Mamertino and wine makes me extremely sleepy. :-)

Anonymous said...

The sweeter the wine the better, amy lou. I like all Black Opals, an Aussie label; gewurztraminer (from Germany, yay!), just about any fume blanc, and Rosa Regale, a red sparkling wine.

Jean said...

I can't believe I'm admitting this but one day my husband said to me "If you see a charge on the credit card for coyote urine -- I really ordered it." That was a new one -- its usually photography equipment. He said it was supposed to get rid of the armadillos that were tearing up the front yard. Yes, we live in Texas.

For the record his wild bachelor party consisted of going golfing with several friends and then having dinner and playing poker in a private "guys only" room at his friend's country club. They all had a great time.

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with a Stripper Gift Certificate? Say, from the RedDog Saloon.

Susannah said...

Monogrammed cufflinks---you give the gifts at the rehearsal dinner, and they wear them to wedding. How special is that???

You didn't mention bridesmaids gifts, but as a bridesmaid many times over, I can honestly say that the gifts I appreciated most were the times that the bride gave us the earrings and necklaces she choose for us to wear in the wedding. Saved a lot of stress over what to wear, and I've worn the sets since then.
I did receive a very nice make-up bag last year, with my initials on it. However it's so pretty that I'm scared to use it.
The worst presents are anything silver/silverplated and that included photo frames! I have a 2 mint julep cups in desperate need of if I ever use them but I still feel guilty whenever I open the silver drawer.

(And if you do go with the deer urine...don't give it to them until after the wedding!)

tamar said...

Hubby didn't have a bachelor party, but I did have a bachelorette party. No strippers, but there was a late night stumble to a nearby bar, complete with my 1st tasting of a (okay 2) Jaeger bombs and a sorta dance on a pool table. Yah, I had fun ;)

Oh yeah, can't forget the fake glasses with the fallus for a nose, that we mended with a Zippo at the bar.

Anonymous said...

Susannah, that is indeed going to be my bridesmaids' gift- the necklace,earrings, and shoes. I'm 1/3 of the way to having it done. I picked up the idea from Julie The Nephew Mama, and the shoes only just now gave out on me. I still wear the jewlery.

Susannah said...

Sweet! You can't go wrong with the bridesmaids' jewelry. In fact I'm wearing my faux pearls (fearls?) from roommate A's wedding (1996) to a Christmas party this evening. A friendship is forever, but fearls are eternal!
Best wishes to you and JtP both!

Jill said...

Perfect gift for the guys: leathermen tools with their name engraved. Useful and fairly inexpensive, but make sure the names are spelled right. My poor husband can't spell to save his life, and I thought for sure he could take care of his own groomsmen. Um, wrong. My brother-in-law's last name was wrong, wrong, wrong. Oops!

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