'Bout Time Those Tigers Started Fighting Back

In case you haven't heard, Roy of Sigfreid and Roy was attacked by one of their white tigers in Vegas last night. (Tiger-racists. They couldn't get an African-American tiger?) This happened on stage. In front of people. I hope the little freak is okay, but a couple details from the story leapt out at me: Tiger bites him in the neck, Roy starts beating at him with a microphone (Was it one of those super-skinny Bob Barker ones? Oh, I hope so) and Sigfreid jets across the stage screaming, "No! No! No!" Both of which were excellent tactics. Because, you know, attacking wild animals will always respond to a little mic upside the head, and if that doesn't work, "No!" will stop him every time.