Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Decor

Many thanks to the lovely 'n' thoughtful Anne The Reader, who so kindly tapped the Amazon Honor System banner for a much-appreciated engagement gift. These FAQs are for you, Anne! It's the Anne The Reader Memorial Wedding FAQ, everybody!

Q. Where are you registered?

A. With Halliburton. There, or Target.

We have forks. What we need is cash. Small bills, please. Unmarked. P.S. This has nothing to do with Halliburton.

Q. Where's the honeymoon?

A. We had our hearts set on Australia, and then we started looking at plane tickets, and the plane tickets alone equal our combined incomes over the next fifteen billion years. So we're working on a few days Colorado.

If you happen to be connected with Colorado, and have the ability to move it over to our side of the country so as to save on airfare, please let us know.

Q. What will the decorations be like?

A. It's difficult to top the quiet elegance of my bridesmaids' shoes, but I think eight or ten of these, tastefully arrayed, just might graze that impossibly high bar:

Then, of course, there's this:

The truly awesome thing about this is, although it doesn't have the classy lights like the arch does, the A/C plug and inflate fan are included. Rock! It's what every bride dreams of: "Everybody get next to the inflatable arch for the pictures while I plug in the cake."

in search of an inflatable crucifix for the altar at: mb@blondechampage.com

13 comments:

Dantelope (Blogger sucks crap) said...

Oh forget the price of the tickets to Australia. Once your plane crashes into the ocean and you wash up on that desert island with The Others, you'll make so much money from the talk show circuit and the merchandising you'll swear it was the best investment you ever made.

Lord, grant me the serenity to know the difference between real life and ABC....

monica said...

The ABC/Lost comment from dantelope had me flashing to CBS and a new Survivor installment "Survivor: The Newlywed Edition". If only the food on Survivor wasn't so scary! Although, if you can eat Skyline Chili, you can handle anything...

Honeymoon in Colorodo sounds gorgeous! Hey, can we donate frequent flyer miles to the cause? I have some American Airlines miles that I'll probably never use...

Ruby Rose said...

Hey MB

What a pity you and JTP won't make it to our shores - you'd need SPF 300+ sunscreen, but you'd be happy while you sizzled.

At some point I was planning to record a demo CD so i can get work singing at weddings - if you want, if I EVER manage to nail down a piano, Tom the accompanist, a venue, a microphone and my friend Karl's computer all at the same time, I could send you a copy and you can play it over the church sound system for that interminable period before the service begins when the ushers are ushing.

Or you can use it for frisbee practice. Whatever.

Cheers

Alexandra

Skittles said...

You know someone tried to crawl inside that inflatable cake to surprise people and popped it in the process.

Congratulations on your engagement!

Toni said...

Is this close enough?

http://purgatorio1.com/wp-content/pics/baloonjesus3.jpg

anne, a reader said...

I couldn't find an inflatable crucifix, but I did find this:
http://ship-of-fools.com/Gadgets/Church/151.html

Hollee Chadwick said...

Congratulations and Kudos to the groomer to be!!!! I am thrilled for you. And guess what my fromer Blogit friend? I am engaged also!!! No wedding date set yet, but I got the BAR (big-ass ring) and he bought the wedding band to match it, so he must be serious . . . or just making a good investment in diamonds. Hmmm . . . better ask him.

MB said...

Toni, that is ABSOLUTLEY THE MOST DISTURBING THING I HAVE EVER EVER SEEN. EVER.

Anonymous said...

Inflatable cake? Sweet!

MB, I think some of the airlines sell gift cards (US Airways for sure). Maybe some of your loving readers could get that for you guys. You could give us a P.O. box to send them to so you can cut down on stalkers. Just a suggestion.

Cbell said...

I think the inflatable cake is a great idea. Not as many calories! Although... I may have seen it somewhere... Kid Rock & Pamela's wedding perchance?

You might want to avoid that one then... but the arch! Now that's class!

red pill junkie said...

wow! inflatable lighted arch... now THAT would be something worth CRYING for at a wedding...

Hey, you have not included in your FAQs what song you guys will choose to dance to... My sister danced with "Everything I do..." by Bryan Adams, so it's no wonder she ended up divorced. So plan carefully! You don't want your kids to be embarrased when you force them to watch the holographic projection of your wedding at your 25th anniversary, seeing their father's friends passed out at the table should be enough aggravation ;-)

the buxom wench said...

Congrats, MB and JTP!! Soooooo happy for you!!

And, of course, free accommodation shall be yours in Australia if you wish when you can manage the tickets some day :).

anne, a reader said...

I'm touched and honored to have FAQs dedicated to me!

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