Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Columbus Tomorrow

And CorningWare today.

For those of you in what we Cincinnatians lovingly refer to as the "chestal region" of Ohio--it' s in the center below the armpit, you see--I'll be reading in Columbus at 7 PM tomorrow.

I go as the proud owner of a scoop. Anne The Reader has most kindly rummaged around my Bed, Bath, and the Groom's Nightmare Beyond registry and come back with with a canister set and a scoop to go with it. Every woman should have a scoop, and a place to put all scooped matter. I think I will use mine for very large mounds of sugar. My pending kitchen smiles upon you, O Anne.

CJ The Reader sent us weaponry. The box says it's a Mr. Bar-B-Q Grill Tool Set, but I could seriously take down an entire terrorist cell with this thing. It's nothing but a box of long pointy metal, and that makes it awesome. CJ is all about homeland security, and I say God bless him.

For some reason, The Readers are intent upon providing me with as much access to alcohol as possible; witness the fact that everyone immediately bypassed the towels and sheets to ship us a margarita pitcher, a set of highball glasses, and a bartending guide. And I say God bless them. Amy The Reader has now added a punch bowl. This makes me the only person in my entire family with a punch bowl, which means I now hold all the power. Ha! I shall share it with Amy. As long as there is punch left.

Now we come to Phil The Almost-Priest and his CorningWare. I knew Phil in college, back when I was dating... not the groom, and Phil was in the chute to become a priest. I encouraged his vocation by setting him up on a double date, and last I heard of him, he's not in the Priest Chute anymore, and has sent me a casserole dish as a lovely parting gift for my soul. That's the third man I've known who has met me and then immediately abandoned all priestly ambitions. Sorry 'bout that, God!

totally worth it for the hot/cold travel pack at:


Jennifer_Glaser said...

Yay about Columbus, MB! Are you going to see Kyle when you're there? Say hi to him for me. xo (RH anthology)Jenn

classickelly21 said...

It sounds like you're getting a lot of kitchen items. Don't your readers realize as newlyweds you'll be spending most of your time in the bedroom. Really, they should be sending you sheets and coupons for places that will deliver to your new house.

Also, the onyl way to keep your kitchen perfectly clean and never break any dishes (you'll want a whole set to pass down to your grandchildren one day) is to NEVER use the kitchen. That is why they made restaurants and paper plates.

Have a good reading.

HelloBettyLou said...

Former priests make the best husbands, so says my best friend's mom (who married a former priest)

Phil The Almost-Priest said...

Ah MB, God will get over it. The Catholic Church...not so much ;-)

I had almost forgotten about that double-date. Ah yes, the memories, the memories!

red pilljunkie said...

About the scoop:

"Leave the scoop in your freezer's ice maker for convenient scooping of ice cubes"

Mmmm... talk about a BRILLIANT IDEA! With the scoop handle as cold as the ice cubes, you might as well USE YOUR HAND.

Josh The Pilot said...

Thanks CJ! I'll know I'm a grown-up, married man when I'm standing over the grill with my own array of utensils, making MB her favorite steak. :)

CJ The Reader said...

You're welcome, Josh. Happy grilling!

amy lou the reader said...


Glad you got it. I'd gladly share punch with you any day.

anne the reader said...

Hey, it's a VERSATILE scoop - who doesn't need one of those?

Best wishes to you guys!

MB said...

Yeah, RPJ, don't be all up in my scoop's grill. My scoop is the shiznit.

MB said...

Hi Jen! Kyle will be out of town that day, because he sucks ;) But I'll yell hello very loudly on you behalf, and if I don't get shot, maybe the echo will still be there by the time he gets back. Great to hear from you!

grammar_queen said...

OK, the people writing ad copy at the Bed, Bath, and Beyond website need to make up their minds. They recommend using the scoop for "ice, coffee, sugar, flour, candy and more," but tack on to the end "great for scooping soil or kitty litter too." Pick a target audience -- a customer is either going to use it in the kitchen or outside. People who would use it in all of the afore mentioned ways would be a little too "versatile" for me.

mike likes columbian coffee said...

And all this time, as a Domer, I thought Columbus was the armpit.


patty m. said...

I heard that priests have a name for women who pursue seminarians: Chalice Chippers. Hee!

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