Monday, October 23, 2006

Pig Time

Welcome to the first all-football post in some time. I like to concentrate on my areas of expertise as an English major.

Two wins this weekend. Like all good old-skool Catholics, however, I can enjoy neither of them.

First: Notre Dame. Deeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaam. This is what I like to refer to as a Lando Calrissian game, for that was too close. No way should it have been that close.

Charlie Weiss pronounced himself "happy" at the end of it. I totally believe him, given the fact that he ran off the field looking like somebody just used his new puppy as a scouring pad.

Josh The Pilot called me when the game was won: "Didja see that? That was awesome!"

I played it like one learns to expect these things, once one is in the Notre Dame family, but I hung up and went back to putting my head between my knees, all, "Thirty-eight seconds... why they always gotta do this with thirty-eight seconds to go."

Next day: Bengals. Precisely one Bengals game has been televised here in The Swamp this year, and it was, of course, this one. Waaaaaaaaay too much awesomeness for one season! So I had to follow the score on ESPN's little GameTracker rectangle, which was inconcievable ten years ago and will be hilariously quaint in another ten, when the game will just be projected directly onto our retinas or whatever. Josh The Pilot, given his divided Panther loyalties, did not watch at all.

This time, I called him.

It was a very long while before he spoke.

"...hello."

"Hey!" Pause. "If it makes you feel any better, Boomer picked your team to win today."

It didn't.

Dan Marino picked the Panthers, too, and even that didn't help. It helped me, though, as I was very glad to see them in agreement on something. I've been nervous for Esiason ever since he called Payton Manning "this generation's Dan Marino" with Dan sitting, like, four inches away. Go watch Marino's face at the end of that clip, tell me you're not going to sleep with your hand curled around a Glock for the next several eons. Laces out, Boomer.

midterms done at: mb@blondechampange.com

18 comments:

Rachel said...

Hurray for football!
(My team also cut it too close this weekend. In overtime. With a mediocre team. Is it any comfort that UCLA is pretty good? And has very pretty uniform colors?)

Life's a Laugh said...

Only two and half more months of football left. What will we do for the rest of the year?

I was rooting for the Bengals, one because I'm a Saints fan and need a little insurance against the Panthers, and two, just gotta love Chad Johnson. I was highly disappointed that Marv told him no more dances, skits, etc. in the endzone. What else is there in life but Chad thrilling us with his endzone theatrics? Did you see his meeting with the media about this? Looked like he just saw his puppy get run over by a semi. Poor Chad.

As far as good ol' Notre Dame goes, I am a die hard Michigan fan. I will be cheering for them to stomp on USC though. Just tired of hearing about how great those guys are out in LA. Wouldn't hurt the BCS if USC lost as well.

MB said...

Chad Johnson owns. Seriously, he needs a talk show. I would tape every single episode. I hope the Bengals make the Super Bowl if only to see him interviewed five thousand times a day.

amy lou the reader said...

Laces out, Boomer.

Ha! That's hilarious. I thought I was the only one who remembered that movie.

On the one Sunday my team (the Packers) pull off a decent win (34-24), *I* decide to take a nap.

Cbell said...

I'm a Bengals fan solely because of Boomer "I'm-too-sexy-for-my-helmet" Esaison(sp?) Loved him. Loved the team. Still love the team.

my kidz mom said...

I am stuck in a football time warp, still savoring da Bears of '86. Superbowl and Sweetness (Walter Payton for those of you outside The City); ah, life was good.

MB said...

Is it an entirely bad thing that I still pretty much know the entire Super Bowl Shuffle by heart?

We're so bad, we know we're good!

Jcat2323 said...

I saw a game clip a week or two ago in which the holder, because of a bad snap, actually put the ball 'laces out' and of course the kick went wide. I think I quoted that movie for about 5 minutes straight after that. Classic!
And speaking of close calls, I'm a Bears fan (and have been for years, I'm not one of those fans), did ya see their offense not play against the Cardinals last week? Thank God for defense (and bad kickers on the other team).

tamar said...

Amy Lou.....I feel your pain!

My daughter entered the hallowed halls of band geekness two weeks ago, and had her debut playing with the marching band before last Friday's game. We stayed to watch the game and it was a TIGHT one. We led 7 to 6 for most of the final three quarters. NOTHING new was happening, six minutes left, and me and mine were freezing our patoots off. We decided, eh? we'll catch the final score on the news tonight.

OMG!!!!!!

The other team (huge rivalry going on here, we were undefeated -note the WERE!) rallied with only 5 minutes on the clock, final score??????

21 to 7 OMG They scored 15 points from the time we left til I slouched down into a warm tub. I AM KICKING MYSELF!!!!!

Oh well, here's to missing the end of an awesome game...:(

BooHoo!

Josh The Pilot said...

I told MB that if the Panthers and Bengals ever play each other in the Super Bowl we'd have to break up for the day, but I would take her back afterwards, no matter the score. This was before I realized last week that they would be playing this last Sunday! As MB described in this post, I was not happy, and we didn't talk until after the game. However, I was true to my word and I took her back. :) Don't worry y'all, I'm a die-hard Panthers fan, but they aren't as fun to cuddle with as Tink. Our relationship is intact and I'm not going anywhere over a football game.

mike, fourth-string punter said...

jcat, you're supposed to hold it laces out. You don't want to kick into the laces.

Jcat2323 said...

mike, the fourth-string punter, you're completely right, I meant to say the laces were in! They were iiinnn!!!

Jcat2323 said...

JTP: Totally know what you're talking about. I'm a Bear, my Sweetie is a Viking, and his dad (also a Vikings fan) bought us tickets to the Bears-Vikings game in Minnesota a few weeks ago. We got comments from all sorts of people before the game as we were each wearing a team jersey and were holding hands. Once the game started it was all bets off. The ride home was a little quiet, mainly because they threatened to strap me to the roof rack if I didn't behave. (For those of you who don't follow the Bears or the Vikings, the final score was 19-16, the Bears winning with a touchdown in the last couple minutes of play after trailing almost the entire game.)

Ophelia said...

Football, bah. I'm stuck with the Lions.
Let's go Buckeyes! I'm eagerly awaiting November 18 for the big Michigan-Ohio State showdown.

can't forget...let's go Tigers!!

Jenib said...

Oooh I saw that look.

The Superbowl Shuffle...MB, I dare you to recreate that on cam and put it on youtube.

tamar said...

I second that dare!!!

Josh The Pilot said...

Ophelia, you've crossed the line. As a newly converted Notre Dame fan, I have to inform you that mentioning the --ckeyes on BlondeChampagne during football season is a big no-no. Please cease and desist forthwith. Thank you! :-)

Anonymous said...

Sorry, as the special teams guy I need to comment. Laces OUT is best, laces IN is next best. The fact they screwed that up kinda ruined Ace Ventrua for me. Having the laces in slightly prevents proper compression on the ball, which may cost a long placekick a few yards. Actually what's bad is having the laces right or left, since that makes it curve a little funny.

Actually, a kicker should never know either way until going over the game film.

Thank God we have "the University of Navy" next week...not that it won't be another one to sweat until the last two minutes...

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