What a great way to end the day.

So I'm listening to Sean Hannity on the drive home yesterday, and I'm thinking, "Who is that weird woman on the phone?" And then Sean said, "We'll be right back with Gary Coleman." Oh God. All I could think about was the eight or nine Very Special "Differn't Strokes" (or however the hell they spelled it) episodes in which various family members are kidnapped and/or nearly molested. (In one of said episodes, an extremely creepy guy used space exploration footage to lure the children into his extremely creepy apartment. As a former employee of the Kennedy Space Center, I hereby object on NASA's behalf. Bait for the jail bait, one thing; association with Gary Coleman, quite another.)
According to a partial replay of the conversation later on in the broadcast, I missed the best exchange of the phone call, which went something like this:

SEAN: Do you know who the Vice-President of the United States is?

GARY: Sure. Of course I do.

SEAN: Who is it?

GARY: I know who the Vice-President is, Sean.

SEAN: A name, give me a name.

GARY: I can't give you a name right now.

SEAN: YOU ARE POSITIONING YOURSELF TO RUN THE SIXTH-LARGEST ECONOMY ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHO THE VICE-PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS?!!?

Gary: I'm not thinking about that right now. My head's not there now.

(Much later in the conversation)

Sean: --and you don't even know who the Vice-President is--

Gary: The Vice-President is Dick Cheney, of course.

Sean: Who told you?

For perhaps the first time in a year and a half, I was relieved to be a Floridian.