Monday, June 11, 2007

Acorn Awards

Plenty of "I'm A Winner!" buttons to go around now that TrumboFest is through. First, the Writing Awards:

"Dude... dude!" Award: "This has nothing to do with the exam but during the last section I watched a paramecium swim in my water bottle."

Fatalism Award: "If we're lucky, most of us grow up."

Forgotten Luggage, and Also Basic Comprehension, Award: "A sense of ignorance or the unavailable comma key on a typewriter can relay to the reader that this narrative was written while still in the rural woods as this story happened."

I Am Automatically Giving You the Lowest Grade Possible Award: "Greetings from TEXAS!!!!!"

Pamper's Pull-Ups Award: "The father is hurt by his son's defecation."

Pamper's Pull-Ups Award Runner Up: "Like the saying goes, every party has its pooper."

Not Very Understated Award: "This essay is not very long, nor very good."

I'm Not Even Touching This One Award: "Trumbo is using syntax that goes around the bush instead of beating around the bush."

Congratulations On Showing Up to Class The Day Alliteration Was Discussed Award: "Trumbo's simple syntax stuns readers, for the simplicity of the snippet mirrors the somewhat childish simplicity of the son's mindset."

And in the Spoken Word category:

I Don't Want To Know Why This Announcement Had To Be Made Award: "Please do not take the exam books into the bathroom."

I Had a Bowl of Rainbows and Denial For Breakfast Award: "I don't think it's very nice to laugh at the students."

still sleeping it off at: mbe@drinktothelasses.com

6 comments:

Brent Bowen said...

May I have a double shot of rainbows and denial?

It sounds like the paper that some of these essays is written on would've been bettter used as toilet paper.

ShannJ said...

This really makes me want to see my essay again. It would be interesting after all these years . . .

You know, instead of laughing at the students, we could laugh at Mr/s Denial instead! Oh wait - they probably wouldn't think that was nice either. So, are they the pooper for this party?

HelloBettyLou said...

I'd laugh at them. They are AP students and morons. Or just really nervous.

--Still proud of my double 4 senior year, HBL

Scherza said...

"I don't think it's nice to laugh at the students."

Whaaaaat? Does that person TEACH?!

It's one of the perks of teaching to laugh at the students! My husband loves hearing Student Stories over dinner. Honestly, some of what they do and say and think is truly hysterical!

Anonymous said...

Hey, Mary Beth! I just happened to go onto your blog linked from your book publication postcard. I think I'm the one who said I was sick of people laughing at the students? Just wanted to defend myself here. I was laughing along with the best of them by the end of the week. But you took my comment out of context. I was complaining about our table leader, Henry's, too-easy jabs at the students. Hey, people, I don't appreciate all the little digs about "Mrs. Denial," etc. Let me say that I've been teaching writing for ca. 10 years or so--I've earned the right to say anything I like about teaching, and students, and AP grading. My only request is, if you're going to laugh at students, your jokes need to be funny. I'd bet none of the commenters have actually ever set foot in a classroom--with the exception of the jaded soul who entertains her husband with student stories at dinner: you poor thing. You actually have even less of a life than I do, it sounds!! Retirement or sabbatical time for you, maybe . . . ? Geez, Mary Beth, et tu brute? After all we went through together, those 7 days at the table??!! Thanks a lot!!--Cara Diaconoff, cdiacono@gmail.com

MB said...

Hi Cara-- no offense meant (you'll notice I didn't call you by name) and I am sorry if I took you out of context; I certainly didn't mean to, and apologize for misunderstanding your comment. Hope you're doing well.

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