Friday, January 05, 2007

Flash II

Since yesterday's activities were so couple-strengthening, this morning Josh The Pilot and I decided to present yet another photographer with the challenge of capturing the world's palest person against a monochrome background. The proofs are like a flip-book of the slow degeneration of my hairspray.

Is there dumber idea in the wedding tradition than an engagement portrait? I never sleep, I hate the entire Earth, yesterday we almost knocked over the ascot table during a tuxedo vest-related scuffle at Men's Wearhouse: Let's preserve the moment! With the finest equipment on the photographic market!

The most important thing, of course, is to ensure that the groom is seen as little as possible, in the proper context:
We were directed into a wide variety of poses. "Josh, I 'm going to need you to perform the Heimlich on your fiancee.""Okay, now let the light of God shine gently upon your faces."


"All right, now we need Photoshop fodder for everybody who hates you."

"Okay, now, Mary Beth, knee your pending husband in the nads."

"That's great. And one more to get you kicked out of the Catholic Church. Be sure your fiance schools his expression to look like he's supporting eighteen anvils on his back."

"Now make everybody vomit."

"One more to create the impression you're responsible adults and not people who eat macaroni out of the pan while watching VH1's 50 Most Rockingest Moments Ever."

It's a good thing we kind of like each other.

aw at: mb@blondechampagne.com

27 comments:

PVT Jeremiah said...

Okay, I'm coming out from my lurking post. This one I couldn't pass up...Josh, why are you wearing waffle-stompers with a suit????!!!!

Jeremiah said...

Leave it up to my brother to show what a ditz he is when it comes to fashion. :)

Anonymous said...

Adorable.
We had to do many of the same poses with our "family portrait"...that's what you have, add psychotic boys aged 5,7 and 9.Fun for us all to lay on my husband :)Then we had to pick the large 18X20 from a very tiny proof, which did not clearly show my monstrous cleavage referred to by a friend as "the 6th member of your family". Yikes.
Of course I love the last one, very sweet.
~VRM

kelebek }{ said...

Awwww. They are very sweet. The "nose touch" one is especially adorable!

Jess said...

Say it with me people: "AWWWWWWW!!!" :-P

amy lou the reader said...

Actually, my favorite one is the last one, but they're all lovely, MB. You really are more photogenic than you claim. :-)

The Husband and I never did engagement portraits; we're saving up for our first family portrait...

cousin alicia said...

That is pretty funny. And they aren't too bad. I'm sure there is one in the bunch that you can use.

ShannJ said...

Adorable! I love, love, love the last one!

ahjen7 said...

ooh, i hope you used the last one. very, very cute.

aazmom said...

Oh, I love the last one the most also! It made me smile happily. Your captions made me laugh, but you both are very good-looking people...and whenever I did photos like this I reminded myself how much my children would (someday) love the photos, like I do of the ones my pre-children parents took. Your children will adore these!

Monica said...

Those pictures were fun! You looked great in every single one, but I have to agree with the majority - the last one is the best. The two of you look great together!

DivineDivorcee said...

Aw, that's so disgusting---
LY cute!

MB, you are way to critical of yourself --> Those are wonderful photos and I agree, the best is the last. Although I really like the "knee in the groin" one :D

I'm still engulfed in the cuteness factor. Need... insulin...

Craig said...

We gave my fiance's brother a digital camera and had him take our engagement announcement pictures. It was cheap and sufficient.

Carrie said...

We had no engagement photo - we had no engagement announcement - in face we have only one wedding photo up in our entire house . . . pictures are overrated once you've actually seeing the person everyday :-) However I agree, they are adorable and I also like the last one the best.

stacey said...

The kicking-JTP-in-the-nads pic was my pick for the cutest (although, after reading the caption, I saw it in a different light...haha). I like the last one, too. Everybody's right, you're more photogenic than you think.

Jenib said...

Very lovely pictures. You guys go so well together. My favorite picture is the last one. Have you considered having any portraits done in nature?

the buxom wench said...

Awwwwwww, pretty :) x

Cbell said...

should we be concerned that the light of the Lord apparently only shines on half of Josh?

Laney said...

Awwww, you guys look so sweet together. The last one is my fav. Your hair looks really cute MB.

Anonymous said...

It could be worse: when my sister & brother-in-law had their engagement photos done, he looked like he was on drugs in every picture. Very appealing!

Jules said...

Ahhh...to be young and engaged again. Well, maybe just young again!.......oops! Did I just say that....?

Anyway, I will add another vote to the pile for that last photo. Definitely the best out of the bunch.

Kelly Lynne Clement said...

MB,

You look so happy and in love. The pictures really are good even if the poses are so "posed". Anyway, happy and in love is the key to this whole thing adn it shows in your picts. Good luck with the rest of the planning.

tamar said...

The true definition of love, is finding someone that can deal with your shi....umm...quirks, and you can deal with their shi....umm....quirks. :)

All the best to both of you. I am so happy that you have found each other.

Although I know it is unnecessary, (I think you put it last for a reason) I also really like the last picture.

MB said...

Thanks for the kind words, everyone. Indeed we are both fans of that last (unposed) picture, as it illustrates our entire relationship: I'm being impossible, and Josh is all, "You see what I have to put up with?"

Josh The Pilot said...

And yet I'm smiling through it all because your impossibleness is simply other part about you that I love!

red pill junkie said...

I agree with the lot: Last one is the best.

I also agree with jenib, you should try to take a few snaps using an outdoor setting. Forget about the professional photographer! Use a digicam and ask a friend to help with the backlight by using a large reflective surface. Take the shots at any time other than noon, maybe 4-5 pm, play with the shadows projected by the foliage of the trees.

MB said...

It might have been cheaper, and easier, and less humiliating to just have a friend do our pictures with a digital camera-- but I doubt anyone but a professional could have gotten that last shot. And I think it's worth it :)

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